The (Happy) People v. The (Unhappy) People: A Defense for Those Of Us Who Are Already Listening to Christmas Music

It seems as though every year we start listening to Christmas music earlier and earlier. In the beginning it was December 1st, then we backed up to the day after Thanksgiving, then November 1st, and then brace yourself…some of us actually start listening before Halloween. I know, the horror! But what has caused this change? What’s behind the Christmas craze? And why are some people so against it?

I suppose we can blame this phenomenon on capitalism and not the happy elves of the North Pole. And I’m being completely serious. It’s really a thing—the Christmas creep. When you see stores start promoting gift sets and decorations right next to the Halloween decorations, that’s the Christmas creep, putting us in the mood to get our holiday spirits on. It’s almost a subconscious thing really; I can’t help but feel the need to put on my Christmas Pop Pandora station when it’s still a blazing 78 degrees outside.

But besides the increasing pressure to spend hundreds of dollars in the name of Jesus Christ and Santa Claus, there are other things that are encouraging many of us to anxiously await Mixmas on Mix 94.5. For starters, Christmas music is just good. Hearing the first few beats of Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas Is You” turns my frown upside down like you would not believe. Of all the music genres, I overwhelming know all the lyrics to every song. If Buzzfeed were to do a “Guess the Lyrics of this Christmas Song” quiz, I would get a 100% in my sleep. I don’t have the science to back what I’m about to say but let’s for a moment pretend I do. Statistically, you are more likely to enjoy a song if you know the words to it and can sing along. Like I said, zero scientific backing on that, but I believe it…in here (I’m pointing at the heart underneath my sternum, you just can’t see that). So Grinches of the world, stop raining (or should I say snowing?) on our parades just because the Christmas-inclined know every word to “Christmas Time is Here,” “Jingle Bell Rock,” the freaking “Wassailing Song,” and every other song in the Christmas Song Book. We sound good! If we were a group of carollers, you’d tip us. If we were singing Christmas tunes in the shower like Zooey Deschanel in Elf, you’d sneak in the bathroom with us. Catchy Christmas music 4ever man!

Another reason people are already listening to Christmas music is because Christmas should last forever. The 25 Days of Christmas are the best 25 days in a year and why are people criticizing us for trying to draw it out for as long as we possibly can? No other time of year can I see all my family at once, get almost two months vacation off from school, and can gain six pounds from Christmas food without judgement.

Lastly and most importantly, we’re listening for the sake of nostalgia. As I’ve said, Christmas is my favourite time of year. Most of my warmest and brightest memories come from the joy the holiday season brings. And I know I sound like the white female, workaholic protagonist of a Hallmark Christmas movie who is finally realizing what Christmas is all about, but that’s because it’s what I’m aiming for. Christmas should be cheesy. It should be a hot chocolate, eggnog, sitting by a crackling fire with the view of the silent majesty of a winter’s morn…the clean, cool chill of the holiday air…an asshole in his bathrobe, emptying a chemical toilet into your sewer…

My best memories are being in one room with the people I care most about, having just eaten the best Christmas meal of my life, sitting around a beautifully lit Christmas tree, and partaking in our yearly Christmas Eve tradition (watching National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation for the 80th time (duh)). Christmas music evokes the same feelings of warmth, happiness, and love that I feel when I’m with my family at Christmas time. And when I’m 4,000 miles away from home, the best thing I can do to cope with missing them is to start listening to Christmas music ridiculously early.

So to those of you who are currently sneering at us for listening to Christmas music, stop being an Ebenezer Scrooge. It’s lame. It’s bah!

May the tradition of listening to Christmas music loudly and obnoxiously as your friends are trying to study live on. May we never feel stage fright when attempting Christmas karaoke. May we have a rockin’ White Christmas and Happy New Year gosh dang it.

So what’s your favourite part about Christmas and its lovely music? Share with me below to spread some Christmas cheer! I hope you enjoyed the post and feel free to share with others who also hum “Carol of the Bells” 365 days a year. As always, thanks for reading and I wish you and your loved ones the happiest of holidays,

Rachel

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